Empowering For The Future

After re-reading my post, I realized that I did not clarify or focus on the points I wanted to make. I talked to several women about relationships recently. Looks as though we all are going through the same thing. The below are summaries of these honest conversations with these women.  "Experience is the best teacher." -Proverb When you are wifey material, guys can pick up on that. They see that you are a good girl, have a lot going for you, and hold yourself to high moral standards and know your own value. However, regardless of if you are necessary their type or their match, they want to hold onto or claim you as their own because they know that's who they NEED. You have all the perfect qualities; you cook, clean, always pampered, down-to-earth, loving, nurturing, independent, hard-working, etc. all the ingredients for the perfect mate but they know you are not their mate! When you see something good, it's natural to want to grab it before someone else does...

10 Tips on Managing and Committing to Your Deal-Breakers: Ladies {and Gentlemen}: Ever feel like you do not have officially made deal-breakers because they are hard to stick to? Do you have deal-breakers but do not know how to break the deal? Fear not! I have 10 tips that may help you establish/create your deal breakers and tips to sticking to them. 1. What is your complete no go?? Make a list of things you cannot stand or tolerate when it comes to your potential mate whether that is in appearance or materialistic things. Crooked teeth, bad B.O., have a child, no job, or no car... Simply make a list of these things. 2. In this list you created, prepare your top 3 worst of all deal-breakers with questions. For example, if your top three are baby daddy, no job, or no car your questions could be "Do you own a car?", "Are you currently employed", and "do you have any children?" Simple right? Also straight forward and communicative. 3. When that perso...

Part 2: When You Are Wifey Material... For the ladies... I wanted to share a little lesson I starting to learn recently. When you are single, you have options correct? No, scratch that; you have choices to make! You can allow someone to pursue you, get into pursuit, or pursue someone first. In other words, you can allow someone to talk to you, get to know you, etc. You can prepare and better yourself for a relationship, or you seek a guy's attention, affection, interest, etc. I am sure there are more options and choices than just those three but for now, I'm going to point those out (mostly because they are simple and less complex). When you are single, it's best to focus on yourself. However,  you may or may not attract potential candidates for the position you are preparing yourself for. This is not a bad thing. You can still work on yourself and entertain guest right? Depends on how and why you do it. One may choose to entertain company because they are lonely, do...

African American Theater Final When one types in “what is a play” into Google, plays such as Hamlet, Macbeth, Romeo & Juliet, and many more line the top of the google search page. Below that is the definition of a play. Google states there are 3,020,000,000 results in .40 seconds. When one types in “what is a black play” into Google, no plays appear at the top of the google search page. Below is no definition of a black play. The first result to appear is not even Wikipedia but a group called “TCG circle”. Google states there are 2,060,000,000 results in .47 seconds. So… one might assume, first, that Google is racist LOL! No, Google is not racist (to my knowledge). But simply asking “what is a play” may be a broad question to ask. Yes, it had more results in a quicker time frame but that is not the issue when proposing this question to Google. What is problematic is the fact that no black plays appear at the top of the Google search in the broad question of “what is a play...

YASSSSSSS GIRL POWER! After seeing this clip, I am TOO EXCITED! I did not hear about this movie on my own. Everyone has been asking me about it or if I heard about it coming out! "Ayana, you'd do something like this!!" or "Ayana, this is right up your ally!"  Fortunately, yes! Both statements are true and I cannot wait to see this movie! Tell me your thoughts and your beliefs below in the comments. Are you excited? Would you be able to withstand the hold? How relative is this in today's society? If this was to happen in real life, what would be the outcome of it? And to what tragedy or situation could this be applied to or help? Look up "Lysistrata" if you do not know her story. Here is the whole trailer for the movie: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_0Bs1df0kPI in theaters NOW!

I'M BACK! Is it Halloween yet because I went GHOST! LOL (My sense of humor clearly did not leave) I honestly have no clue why I haven't been blogging. I think I have been trying to fill that time by going to sleep or catching up on social media accounts, etc. Speaking of, I recently got in my first argument about the Black Lives Matter movement so my stance on that is another topic coming soon. It will definitely bring the focus back on Blacks and women (my two platforms) for this blog. Anyway, this information from this blog post references the personality traits mentioned in an article about " Dating an Alpha Female ". This post is to clear the air for my readers about what it means to be an Alpha Female... from my personal experiences. My History If you would have ask my eleven year old self what I thought about my 21 year old self, she would not fathom the mere IMAGE of me and how I have developed. Here's why: In my younger years, I suffered from ...

Growing up and not being in relationships as my peers made me question myself, "what is wrong with me that would make no one look to date me?" I found that some females, mostly the ones that are single for a long time, are asking themselves this same question. Wanna know the answer? NOTHING! Nothing is wrong with you. Being single means you take the time to relearn yourself, spend time with yourself, and fall in love with yourself all over again. Being in relationships cause you to forget that you are an individual. Sometimes it causes you to forget to do things that make yourself happy. I find myself in a difficult position when my girl friends complain about not being in a relationship. I tell them all the same thing "Focus on yourself and the right one will just come when you aren't paying attention". That may be true but from a spiritual standpoint, you must focus on GOD first, build your spirit man up, and GOD will send you the right one. Even I had to ...

Lame title of a blog post but y'all know me! ;-) I hope all is well. I haven't said that on here in awhile... or ever. After much debate and talking with others about how my blog came along and the essence of the title, etc. I decided to create another blog. It is hard for me to do since I use this one to vent or post different things I encounter or think about all on one blog. However, since this one is established to educate people on women's and race issues, I feel as though making another blog for my Christian views and encounters with God is necessary.  I can go on and on about God's Grace and Mercy and about the relationship I am building with Him everyday. I just know that people sometimes do not want to hear that and may turn away from my blog altogether. Additionally, I do not remember stating in my blog vision that I will tackle Christian views and spiritual although they do tie in often when it comes to my views with women and race. I also feel as th...

Welcome to Part 2 of my first official blog series! Side note: I lowkey forgot that I started Identity Crisis which is technically the first blog series I attempted. The reason why I have not finished that series is because I have not fully accomplished my own Identity Crisis especially with my newly found/renewed spiritually identity. I am going to set up the basis of understanding what I mean by "Your Rent is Due" which is the title of this blog post. Step 1: Understand what the word "rent" means. In the English dictionary as a verb it means "to pay someone for the use of" and as a noun it means "a tenant's regular payment to a landlord for the use of property or land". However in the Bible, rent means "to divide or tear apart". How does this connect? I'll tell you in a second. Step 2: Understand that whatever context you see that "rent is due"equals consequences if not done. For example, what is the result if ...

Long time, No see! Congrats! You have just opened or commenced my first blog series! I feel as if this topic is necessary for a blog series since there is so much going on in the world and with my generation. In light of the events going on in the world, it is imperative that we, this young adult generation, get down to business and stop being distracted by social media, gossip, music, etc. yet use these things for our advantage. We have so much potential, creativity, activism, charisma, and so much more to get a lot more things done in our society and bring change. After all, we are the next leaders. I have the understanding that it is a part of my calling to help my generation and lead them to the Promise Land (Joshua and not Moses' style). Speaking of, I have been studying the book of Joshua in the Bible (New International Version). I want to be able to listen and obey God's commands without hesitation or second guessing him. With all of that comes day-to-day practice...

To change the system of oppression against women In a previous blog post, I stated that I was going to talk about how men could get involved more in helping women ( click here to review post).  Much anticipated answers needed for my male readers huh? I recently encountered another man (a professor) who had no CLUE about his influence in helping women or how to be apart of the women's movement as a man. Keyword there: HE'S A PROFESSOR ! The solution to this dilemma is quite simple... STAND UP AND SPEAK OUT! If wives, mothers, daughters, sisters, and girlfriends knew they had support from their male counterparts who spoke up for them in situations that bought them gender discrimination, they would be more confident and driven to stand up for themselves. No matter the setting. For example, say you (the guy) are walking in the mall with friend or group of friends that just so happen to be girl(s) and a guy whistles at her or calls out to her in a discriminatory way (could ...

Happy Blogiversary to Me! Chessy to celebrate this but I am very proud that I found myself committed to something different and even to the fact that I kept it up. I love talking about issues I am passionate about and that I found myself {over}analyzing. I also love the fact that I can speak my mind and also do some research. It's hard trying not to be bias but as I evaluate my blog and all it's posts I think I was faithful and obedient to my Blog Vision .  If you follow my blog or even if you don't, I think this is the perfect time to share some facts about "Empowering For the Future" blog:  740 pageviews 23 (now 24) published posts 15 posts in 2014 (starting in May) and 8 so far for 2015 " The New Sarah Baartman: It's a Man's World " post received 95 views and is my most popular blog posts 2 posts received 2 comments (one of each including my own response back) 2 viewers completed the survey at the bottom of the blog Received...

She is n't pretty enough, good enough, dum b  enough,  thin enough, thick enough, smart enough, bl e ssed enough,  black enough, white   enough,  rich enough,  t a n enough,   poor enough,  blonde enough, nice enough, n u rturing enough, thoughtful enough,  girly enough, t omboy enough, momma's g i rl enough,  tall enough, short enough,  spo i led enough, f air enough,  long-haired enough,    short-haired enough,  u gly enough,   passive enough,  assertive enough,  mode l   enough ... Enough is ENOUGH! We get criticism like this on a daily basis and it's about time we say enough is enough and accept no less. YOU ARE BEAUTiFUL !  (In the words of my epiphora {using a repetitive word at the end of a line or clauses} "she is" meaning you!) Be yourself! Stand out in the crowd and be unique from everyone else. Stop trying to meet societal or your peers' expectations of who you ...

This semester, I was in a pageant. One of the portions was an On-Stage Question and Answer (seen in the picture). My question was "If you could go to dinner with any celebrity, who would it be and why?" Easy right? Not for me. When I was first told that there would be on stage questions, I automatically knew that there was no way for me to prepare for it. I SUCK  at on the spot questions but for whatever reason, I do very well at interviews (weird). I just never been good at thinking on my feet. So when I got on stage and pulled that question I thought "Hmm... any other day this would be easy but tonight I can answer it in many ways." The first celebrity I thought was Martin Luther King Jr. but I wouldn't have anything to say other than "Thank you Dr. King but we still have some work to do." Then I thought about Rosa Parks, same thing. Then I told myself "Think of someone everyone likes"... Ugh, that meant Beyonce *eye roll*. She...

Since finals are over, I have to reflect on one of my favorite Women and Gender Studies' classes I was in this semester. I took the Women in Theater course here at Winthrop University and learned so much! We had to read a play for every class; some were online and some were not. For each unit, we read three plays that related to that unit or what she, my professor, called "Thought Clusters". We discussed Self & Identity, Sex & Sexuality, Reflections of War, Women in Social Services, and Adaptations.  Every play opened the door for learning. They included diversity, controversy, surreal, mystical, funny, historic, unique, and all about women. I thoroughly enjoyed the class because it touched on aspects of theater and women's issues. So I decided to make a list of my favorite plays that I encourage you all to find and read for leisure (I would number them but they all are good). Please let me know if you read these plays and want to share your thoughts o...

Yay!!!! FINALS ARE OVER!!!! I am officially a Senior in college now. Time flies! Previously, I posted about sharing something near and dear to my SOUL. God has personally been dealing with me A LOT lately regarding this so I think it is about time to share... In this blog post, I am sharing what God revealed to me about my purpose here on Earth is. This blog has changed my life completely! I find it inspiring and motivational to not only others but mostly to myself! I do not remember if I ever shared with you all that I had an online diary where I talked about my thoughts and issues that I witnessed or even faced in my life. The diary wasn't TOO serious or in depth but I longed for more. Meanwhile, it wasn't until I attended the Women's Studies info session about picking it up as a minor. There, I met the director and many other Women's Studies minors and listened to what they had to say about their experiences. I was intrigued! I was convinced by these elite g...

Greetings All, I MISS BLOGGING!!!!!!!!!! In honor of me missing you all, I decided to do a quick post on what God has in store in my life. I wrote this bio in an e-mail a few months ago when my favorite high school teacher invited me to speak come back and speak to young girls in a Women Ambassadors club (where they seek to encourage and support young women in their academic and professional success now and in the future). I am honor to have such privilege and will be going this Friday (pics coming soon). A lot of things I hope to become, I have and will be. I am literally counting my blessings... get to know me and where I am now. I think it's good to sit back and recognize all the things you have accomplished and pat yourself on the back. Keep going! Remember: you are free to comment below! Hope this inspires you! "Ayana Crawford is a Junior Psychology Major, Women and Gender Studies Minor at Winthrop University. Ayana is very involved on campus and has ...

                                  THE WORLD IS COMING TO AN END AND THE FUTURE HAS NOT BEEN EMPOWERED! Just kidding lol... BUT there is a crisis going on that is going to affect our future youth. This crisis outbreak started within society through television, commercials, newspaper ads, print ads, celebrities, and now through social media more than ever! The creators or "scientists" we may call them, mainly males, are not too far from genius yet unconscious of their decisions that created flaws and have affected thousands of people especially women. This outbreak is so major and serious, we are beginning to be called an epidemic! The symptoms include but are not limited to: Confusion Self-pity Comparing Self to Others False advertising Fakeness/Pretending Low self-esteem Low self-confidence Attention-Seeking Behavior Seeking Self-Justification Selfie/Hashtag Overload and more! Ple...

So my first draft of my blog post titled "Get Over It" was a little too harsh to post. Since I am a black  Feminist, I feel as though I should touch on Black issues on my blog as well. Race issues is something I found to be passionate about and relevant to me just like Women's issues. Please remember I have the right to freedom of speech and of press and the following is strictly opinions and minor facts. Get over it has been the central point of a lot of people's Facebook and Twitter posts when it comes to the discussion of Michael Brown, Eric Garner, etc. I was upset by the various opinions and borderline racist comments made by people in our society including {and shockingly} made by some friends/acquaintances of mine. The fact that people were saying that it had nothing to do with race and to "get over it" was very ignorant and insensitive on their parts. I was appalled for WEEKS by everything that people were saying but getting over it was  is somethi...